i am still

and will always be happy and cheerful!

oh man

all my life consists of now is working out, going to work and school. I rarely see my friends, I wish things were like they used to be, when I had friends that really wanted me to come over or when we would go super late at night and do runs to 7-11! I wish I had someone to truly talk to, all the people I used to always talk to kinda drifted away....

LA soon and then it will hopefully be new friends and new memories! I can't wait to travel the world soon. I am gonna start with New York in August and then it's off to Spain in September!



PS just about everyone I know sucks at being upfront, no one tells me what's on their mind or what they truly think the answer is, they just beat around the bush. Don't worry I am a big boy and believe me the answer wont hurt my feelings.
Altogether I have had only a few friends be upfront with me and it felt good: Martin, Britanny, Chris (Smurf), Joel, Dave and Cody.

Is it really that hard to give me an honest and truthfully answer, white lies are still LIES!

same day, same story

just watched nick and nora's infinite playlist, it was really good! made me want a girl who is fun to hang out with.

reno next weekend! if you know me then you know what reno means!
i can't wait to have fun and not have a worry in the world!
the second that needle peirces my skin and injects the ink is the second I forget about everything, th greatest feeling in the world!


well my dogs squeeling which means I gotta walk him. gonna take him to the dog park, shits gonna rule!

oh and he just ran into a wall with a blanket over his head hahahaha!

This goes out to many kids in Miami

Can’t stand these true lies
Plaugin the times with lines
Lines white like the ghosts you pray you never find
They find you only to become you and run you
One, two, these numbers ensue you
But numbers can’t count the dead
What you dread found a way into your head
An Illness caught by a sickness so strong the death toll’s now countless
What’s this? These questions are endless, the answers are relentless
No prisoners, no remorse, once the sickness takes its course
Through your veins all behind closed doors,
A body soars, through the imaginary sky of lies,
Everything is fine till a limp body hits the floor
Now this high you have come to adore hit it and quit it like a filthy whore
Torn, motionless and broken your eyes see nothing but darkness
Senseless minds now wasted, priceless endorphins left you lifeless
Ribs cracked, arms snapped, the cold hard cement now a pillow, results of your recent relapse
Your eyes cry tears of blood as you’re soaked in your own vomit
Although the cement broke your fall you still plummet,

Can’t find this so called mind
Lines took up your time
Nine lives narrowed down to a dime
Lies of signs that lead your façade of a life
Now too late your body relies on the slice of a knife
A corpse upon the cold hard steel things just got real
A race against time your body is far from fine
May be close to death now but the truth is you’ve been dead for years
One of your latest past times just became one of your greatest fears

realizations of a better day

over the past few days I realized how great of friends I have and what they all think of me, really boosted my self esteem and made me happy. they told me they have respect for me cause I dont have to fight physically to hurt someone, I just use words and I didn't know so many people thought I was the nicest kid they know really made me smile. haha now I need a nice girl to realize the same thing! it might be because when I say my friends come first I mean it.

when you take a look around you your problems never seem that big compared to a 13 year old kid who is suicidal or others that have to struggle everyday just for a piece of bread. My friend told me when he grows up he wants a 6 million dollar mansion and I disagreed, I said I want a nice small house next to a beach. I really dont want to be filthy rich, I just want to make enough money to travel the world and take care of my family.




everyday i make the same wish and hope it comes true eventually.
oh and i just woke up!

hahaha

my dog ran into the screen door today cause he didnt know it was there!

a few friends and I went kayaking in the ocean, it was so relieving and a seal swam next to us!
if I could I would kayak everyday! more of a reason to live next to the ocean! I can't wait to kayak again, off to the dog park!

Britanny bring Peanut so he can play with Winston!

my best friend

just pooped on my bed and couch! yet he's still amazing!

I wanna delete

everything I have that has to do with the internet haha
my friend and I were talking about relationships and I have come to realize I suck and here is the reasons why:
1. The only girls I ever truly like will never and have never liked me back.
2. The only girl to ever dump me was the girl I cared most about.
3. I stopped feeling as if I was good enough for any girl, I got no self-esteem anymore.
4. The single timer is now at 1 year and 3 months
5. I think I am just gonna be single for another year

pictures I entered into a competition

i hope i do well!

wrote something originally and deleted it

So here I am content without actually being content, I am somewhat happy.

so here is the deal!

I am graduating in August and traveling the world or as much as I can get to!
Starting with NYC and then going to England, Scotland, and Ireland and then continuing my journey by taking a train to Spain and afterward crossing over to Morocco to see my family. Then I will come back home and work for a year and then it is off to Australia!


wanna come?

I can't wait

for summer, all the things I said I'd do and all the things that are going to happen!
I hope everything goes as planned! Winston is learning how to be a good dog, it's taking time but slowly and surely he is getting better at not pissing in my house!

Britanny I hope your sister gets better soon and Have Heart still has till October which is their last show in Boston, they might be at Sound and Fury so get your ass out here!

Keepin my head up is the best thing I have done for myself so far!

WOW!

Have Heart is done?! Hardcore is officially dead! In the last 2 years so many of my favorite bands kicked the bucket:
Set it Straight
See it Through
Allegiance
Have Heart
Verse
Life Long Tragedy
Modern Life is War
and much more.....

damn it! Well at least Floorpunch is back and so is H2O and possibly Ten Yard Fight!

haha woohoo!

still single and hating it but as happy as I can be :)
maybe it's cause the girls suck here or maybe I am just not good enough for a nice respectable girl. what ever the reason is I just dont care anymore, it's been over a year and a half since I have had a girlfriend and there is only so much time that a guy can care about if he is single or not.

got news from my dad that a bunch of lawyers got fired in NY and he's scared about his job and so am I, if he loses his job I gotta move back to FL I might just move back anyway though, not for sure but a good possibility.

I wanna be like James Cagney

I've thought about it

and decided that in the end when all is said and done I will or really wanna be in England.

all I can say is OI!

damn I am happy!

watching english films makes me love the word CUNT more then I already do haha!

have ya ever wondered...

if ya did things way differently how things would be now?

pfft who am I kidding, everyone has!

what if I studied harder? what if I applied to Emerson University? I really wish I tried to get in when I had the chance.

So I've got another chance to change things and get into a good school to get my masters and I better really try this time and not just say I am going to!

i realize

that what I said was entirely idiotic and I almost regret saying it but it was the truth. I need to stop being so down and out cause I know that is not how I want to be. I have everything I need and want right now and I should be happy. I guess it is weird to go from the way things were to the way they are now. I just wish I could have as much fun as I used to.






pebbles can you please come to california? haha I will pay for your ticket in full, I just need some real fun.

who I was

is not who I am now, I am not the same "JD" everyone got to know and I will never be him again.

my puppy likes blackberries

he's adorable and very obedient, has a bit of a biting problem but what puppy doesn't.
my best friend by far.




I want what I could never and I stress NEVER have.

fuck it

what's the point?

grandpa!

had dinner with my grandpa and reminisced about old times. I said, and Lidia agreed with me, my grandpa is like Monk off the TV show Monk trait for trait but if it weren't for his OCD he wouldn't be as funny as he was back in the day. When I was little I used to mess with all his stuff when he took me on trips and rearrange and turn stuff in different directions so when he came back he would change everything back and then he would laugh. I love him so much, by far one of the greatest reasons to visit! He told me he is going to pass all his old drawings, which were incredible, down to me as soon as he finds them! When he told me that I was more excited then I have been in ages, I can't wait to frame every pic and brag about them to my friends and visitors telling them my grandpa did that!